Just what is the difference between a castle and a palace? A docent recently told me that castles were built as fortifications where as palaces are essentially big fancy houses. I think there’s a little more to it. Castles are almost designed to be incredibly uncomfortable. They are cold, drafty and intensionally hard to get in to with narrow, steep and winding stairways. Palaces are plush, amazingly adorned and some are pretty cushy. Their commonality lies in the fact that they are both designed to impress. Castles, as well as providing protection from the disgusting rabble just outside the gates, were built to impress your enemies with your size and might. The sheer bulk of the structure could strike fear in the hearts of your foe as his cannon balls bounced off the 12’ thick walls. Just approaching them could be dangerous. Arrows could rain out of the little slit windows at a moments notice. Hot oil could pour down on your head from the 100’ ramparts. It both looked and felt impregnable. Now a palace was built to impress in a whole different way. Your wealth is your fortification, your cannons are loaded with political and social connections. To gain entrance to a castle you might have to scale a wall, cross a moat, walk under a murder hole and hack your way through a battalion of blood-thirsty mercenaries. Where as getting into the palace may only involve passing through an army of groundskeepers and a phalanx of maids and butlers but could be just as daunting a task. At some point wealth and status becomes as powerful a weapon as the sword and the cannon.

Örebro Castle

Kärnan

Gripsholm Slott

Gripsholm is an amazing property. Although never attacked it most definitely began its life as a fortress when Bo Jonsson Grips built the first structure on the little island in 1370. It became a monastery in the 1400s until King Gustav I took over. In 1526 he both reinforced the fortifications and turned it into one of the royal residences. The Slott was renovated in 1773 and again between 1889 and 1894, getting a little more palace-like each time. Most of the monarchs from the 16th through the 18th century spent considerable time in Gripsholm.

In the words of the great Mel Brooks in The History of the World Part 2, “It’s good to be the King!”, unless, of course, you get exiled or imprisoned or poisoned by your power hungry brother or unscrupulous children. It would appear that Kings don’t really have any friends. Even their closest advisors will turn on a dime.

Gustav was elected King by the Swedish Parliament but quickly decided that harmony could only be achieved if his heirs replaced him. After his death his first son Erik became King but Erik didn’t trust his brother Johan. He charged him with high treason and imprisoned him with his wife in a small two room apartment for four years. When Johan was finally released he immediately imprisoned Erik in the same apartment and began to slowly poison him. Johan took over but died in 1592. Johan’s son Sigismund was supposed to became king but his Uncle Charles IX had a different plan. He quickly imprisoned his nephew and eventually exiled and deposed him. So much for family harmony.

In all the portraits of the House of Vasa the men wear tights or, more accurately, silk stockings. No there were no pilate classes and they weren’t dancers. In the 16th century what made a man beautiful were his legs and particularly shapely calves. This was so important that when Erik XIV tried to arrange a marriage with Elizabeth I of England he created this portrait with the hope that she would be so smitten with his appearance that it would seal the deal. In order to hedge his bets he decided that one of the stable boys had the nicest legs in the castle and had the painter replace his legs with the boy’s. Queen Elizabeth didn’t take the bait but she did keep the portrait.

Charles IX has a comb-over that would put Trump to shame. He braided the side bits and then fashioned them into a cross to express his Catholic devotion.

This Rune Stone was erected in the 11th century to honor Ingvar the Far-Travelled. At least twenty-six Ingvar Runestones refer to Swedish warriors who went out with Ingvar on his expedition to Russia, down the Volgar River and on to the Middle East to war against the Saracens. 

The inscription reads;

They fared like men far after gold and in the east gave the eagle food. They died southward in Serkland.

To give the eagle food is to kill your enemy.